“As a result of this regretful experience, have I changed the way I behave and respond to similar situations?” I’ve often had to explore the situation more closely to help my clients recognize what they had done right.Ĥ. “Was there anything I did right in the situation that I regret so much?” But they don’t take into consideration any other factors that contributed to the problem.ģ. I have always found that people who are drowning in regret take complete responsibility for their mistakes. “Was it only me or did anything or anyone else contribute to my mistake?” If you were to ask yourself this question, you will probably realize that you did what any person in your shoes would have done given your background, circumstance, and the information you had.Ģ. “Could I have acted any differently considering the particular stage in my life and the information or experiences I had until that point in my life?” I then ask these questions to explore a regretful situation further:ġ. Responses typically indicate the negative influence of regret, such as losing confidence, not wanting to be around people, and being more self-deprecating than necessary. “Have you noticed how the excessive regret affects what you do and say?” These help move people toward thinking and behaving differently about their regrets. Over time I have found that one very effective strategy is to ask key questions. In the early years of my career as a clinical psychologist and psychotherapist I often struggled to find a way to help some of my clients cope with their thoughts and feelings of regret: “If only I had recognized my cheating boyfriend for what he really is,” or “I wish I’d been a better and more patient mother to my son,” and “If only I’d studied harder I would have done better in life.” Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Resources.Types of Mental Health Care Professionals.Adult ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder).Body-Focused Repetitive Behaviors (BFRBs).Obsessive-Compulsive & Related Disorders.

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